Nancy: I do not feel well.
Scott: What's wrong?
Nancy: Well, TMI time, it's my lower gastrointestinal system.
Scott: Why don't you want to go to church?
Nancy: Myriad of reasons but I really am sick.
At church, I feel sweat dripping down my back.
Nancy: I'm going home. I feel like crap.
Scott: You know I'm teaching Sunday school today. I could use some encouragement.
Nancy: Go get 'em, Tiger. 'Bye.
Next day - texting:
Scott: Holy crap! What did you give me! I feel awful!
Nancy: Why don't you want to go to work today?
Nancy: Bad news. It's not a one day thing.