She spent the next 7 days begging me to act normal.
Ideas for freaking out a prom date:
- Find Grandma's old house dress. Secure pillows beneath it. Hairnet. Big glasses. Decorate house with doilies and hang afghan over sofa backs.
- Go all Greg Brady on him. Hang beads in doorways, install disco lights and lava lamps. Dress in tie dye and bell bottoms. 'Fro hair. Tell him about Woodstock then stop, midsentence, and stare off in the distance like on a "trip."
- Pioneer with bonnet. Discuss ancestors at length. Especially the ones who died a gruesome death coming across the plains. Show pictures of Peg Leg Whitney.
- Same as above but include three "sister wives" to greet date in same garb.
- Go Cougar route - tight sweater with deep V-neck, push-up bra to add cleavage, rat hair, short leopard print skirt, high heels. Pop gum gratuitously. Keep touching his arm and call him "Sugar."
- No special dress, just lead him into the kitchen where the dad is polishing his new shotgun. Introduce to huntin' dog, Sunday. Tell him her name is Lucifer.
Any more ideas?