Mar 18, 2011

Talent Scout

A talent agency interviewed my 15 year old someplace last week.  Then someone called from Hollywood to tell her an audition will be held on March 26th.  Anna-Marie (That's Onna) will personally be there for the audition.  It totally pissed me off that they are preying on the insecurities of teenage girls AND trying to sell them something without parental input.  Except the sales doesn't come until the audition, of course.  

If her parents tell her it's a scam and it's not and she loses an opportunity, we've ruined her future.  So I had to debunk her myself.  I took the telephone from her.

It filled me with a certain amount of perverse glee.  

What's the process, exactly?  I asked.

Oh.  We do movies like Mr. and Mrs. Smith and Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie, Nacho Libre, etc. etc.

What exactly do you "do" with Angelina and Brad?

We don't do Ang and B, we do actors and actresses like them.

What part did you play in Mr. and Mrs. Smith and Nacho Libre?  

I'm sorry, I mean movies LIKE those.

What actresses and actors do you personally work with?

Due to legalities, I am not really at liberty to disclose that.

Of course not.

What we do is we have an audition and if there is raw talent, I pass it onto my agents.  If the talent needs to be developed, we offer training ..... Ah.  There it is.

So this training, is it in L.A. or here in Podunk Town, Utah?

Oh, in Utah, of course.


I don't really know.  I'm a director so I don't get into the details of that.

You're a director in Hollywood, calling from a call center and doing scouting?!  I said this in the most friendly voice.

Oh, not THAT kind of director (she laughs nervously).  I am a director at the company I am working for.  

Fantastic.  Will you spell your name for me?  Full name.  And what's the telephone number where I can reach you after I've talked to my people?  Perfect.  I'll let you know.

Then I begged my daughter for any more calls from Hollywood.  It was a lot like fun.  Maybe I need a hobby.


EmptyNester said...

That was great! Now I wish someone would call here so I can have a go at them! LOL

Anne said...

My dad used to love calls from credit card companies. He would always say something like "Great! I just declared bancrupcy and I need
$20,000 right away. Can I get that much cash off of this card?" Amazing how fast they would hang up!

June Freaking Cleaver said...

The John Casablancas modeling agency does the same sort of thing - tells the girls they have potential, then sets up an interview, where they tell them that they can't get anywhere without a portfolio.

A portfolio they are more than happy to shoot (and charge an arm and a leg for).

And after the portfolio is paid for? You never hear from them again.

Abby said...

You rock, Nancy!

M-Cat said...

Well done! My middle son entertained the idea of being an actor for a period of time. We even took him to a talent agency and when he found out he would have to actually PRACTICE at acting, it was over for him.

I love your chutzpah!

Jaci said...

I was going to mention the Modeling Agency ploy of getting people to *invest* in pictures. I guess when it's a real deal, you don't pay them--they pay YOU. That's what Tyra Banks says on Top Model anyway. :)

.:Anna:. said...

I was just going to say... they are constantly looking for Disney kids here in Houston! Maybe you can fly down here for an audtion but you'll have to be quick because they're only taking the first 100 that show up. ... I suppose even if the first 100 were all troll babies they're still only taking the first 100.

Tonia said...

We work with people like Brad and Angie. Oh yeah, and we call them that when we see them.....
Another detail you didn't know about my life. My dad and brother do special effects for movies. So, he went from polygamist family in Utah to Hollywood. How's that for moving up in life?

Tyne said...

Ha! That is crazy funny, love how you handled the situation.